Translation of Cato As A Pun by Of Montreal

From:

Cato, play with my head
I won't know the difference
if we're living in the novelist or statistician

ooo-ooo-ooo

Cato, mess with my concepts
my innervision
like a strobing light
Please confuse my every decision

I can't even pretend that you are my friend
what has happened to you and I?
and don't say that I have changed
'cause man, of course I have

Are you far too depressed now even to answer the phone?
I guess you just want to shave your head, have a drink, and be left alone

Is that too much to ask?
Translate to:

Cato, play with my head
I won't know the difference
if we're living in the novelist or statistician

ooo-ooo-ooo

Cato, mess with my concepts
my innervision
like a strobing light
Please confuse my every decision

I can't even pretend that you are my friend
what has happened to you and I?
and don't say that I have changed
'cause man, of course I have

Are you far too depressed now even to answer the phone?
I guess you just want to shave your head, have a drink, and be left alone

Is that too much to ask?