Translation of What if god smokes cannabis by Weird Al Yankovic

From:

If god had long hair and a goatee
And if his eyes were pretty glazed
If he looked spaced out
Would you buy his story

Would you believe he had an eye infection?

And yeah yeah god looks baked
Yeah yeah god smells good
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah
What if god smoked cannabis?
Hit the bong like some of us
Drove a tie-dyed microbus
And he subscribes to rolling stone

If god made this place, in the beginning
Did he plant any seeds?
Or did he put them there for Adam and Eve
So they'd be hungry for the apple
That the snake was always offering

And yeah yeah god rolls great
Yeah yeah god smells good
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah
What if god smoked cannabis?
Do you suppose he had a buzz?
When he made the platypus
When he created earth our home
Does he like pearl jam or the stones?

And do you think he rolls his own
Up there in heaven on the throne
And when the saints go marching home
Maybe he sits and smokes a bowl
Translate to:

If god had long hair and a goatee
And if his eyes were pretty glazed
If he looked spaced out
Would you buy his story

Would you believe he had an eye infection?

And yeah yeah god looks baked
Yeah yeah god smells good
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah
What if god smoked cannabis?
Hit the bong like some of us
Drove a tie-dyed microbus
And he subscribes to rolling stone

If god made this place, in the beginning
Did he plant any seeds?
Or did he put them there for Adam and Eve
So they'd be hungry for the apple
That the snake was always offering

And yeah yeah god rolls great
Yeah yeah god smells good
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah yeah
What if god smoked cannabis?
Do you suppose he had a buzz?
When he made the platypus
When he created earth our home
Does he like pearl jam or the stones?

And do you think he rolls his own
Up there in heaven on the throne
And when the saints go marching home
Maybe he sits and smokes a bowl